Sunday 22 August 2004

The Olympics

A sports event that even those who aren't particularly interested in sport watch. We've always been really into it. That and Wimbledon. I preferred it when the winter and summer olympics were in the same year though.

So far:
  • I've been glad that the little american (Carly Patterson) won the individual gymnastics over the anorexic-looking russian (Sventlana Khorkina). Still doesn't quite feel like a sport when the competitors wear glitter in their hair and blue eyeshadow (just a little bit too come dancing). And there's something really unnatural about the bends in their little spines and jerky arm waving between tumbles on the floor.
  • I've been in awe of the massive Phelps in the pool. And sorry the team GBR were such a bunch of whingey whiners. Appalled by Sharon Davis' interviewing technique (asking the Scot who had just failed to make the final if she was going to hang up her goggles and make babies from now on).
  • I've watched the weird spectacle of the table-tennis doubles - minute studied serves and massive overblown gestural strokes. Bouncing around the tiny table full of pent up aggression.
  • I've listened closely to the sweaty badminton and discovered there is no sound apart from the squeak of tennis shoes on plastic flooring.
  • I've ogled the strutting pumped up peacocks that run in the men's 100 metres. Big Testosterone. Fluff themselves up. Stare down the straight. Flex unbelievably enormous thighs. [Even the women's race is the same - these women have better six packs than most men - bodies pared down to bone and muscle]. Massive burst of running. And at the end lots of standing around pounding their chests (with a bit of real men hugging thrown in - arms round, big slap on the back, no chest contact).
  • I've caught the end of the rowing, the win (just) and the tears of joy. And laughed at the fact they are racing in the waters of Skinny Ass [Schinias].
  • I've questioned whether some of the events actually are olympic sports - they may be nice to look at but are they really sport - I'm thinking sychronised swimming, rhythmic gymnastics, beach volleyball (and yes I do understand that its not really about the sport but about the bikinis and bronzed bodies of the lithe female players), to name a few. Perhaps the next introduction could be pole dancing (its difficult, has a degree of skill and keeps you fit, no reason why it couldn't be marked out of ten for execution and difficulty).

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