The Tinderbox Lovey Darhling

A blond deep-voiced woman with one dangly earring wearing a poncho was reading a casting copy of The Happiest Day or something like that - a Yorkshire TV production that she was auditioning for. I know this because an older australian woman with a pink hat and a squeaky voice was asking her if she was trying out for it or was in it. On finding out that she was trying out for it she wanted to know if she found auditioning nerve wracking? The blond felt not really, only sometimes when it was something really important.

And then the blond started fidgeting - she was drinking cappuccino but it was too strong and she needed more milk, she was slurping quite loudly and eating froth off the spoon. Her s's were harsh and sharp and kept splitting my ears. She had to get on the phone so as not to talk to the aussie anymore.

"...but Linda Barker is a moose. A real C-list celebrity acting like she's somebody, complaining about the make-up artist. Everybody thought she was a dick..."

I'm with everybody, personally..