Celebrity Love Island

David Beckham sits on a fake desert island, shading himself under a fake palm tree, reading the paper. Victoria is wearing big Jackie O sunglasses and suppresses her yawns. A woman in a lairy teeshirt shoves a half-pack of love hearts at me with an ad for the next round of celebrity reality tv. Do we really need it? Its Friday morning, its London Bridge Station. And the Victoria-a-like isn't even that good (David, on the other hand, is remarkable, although he doesn't appear to be able to dribble a ball, even though it is a papier mache coconut).